Essential Israel websites for postal needs, directions, movies, bus routes, and more
I know it might seem like a strange combination, but this is a collection of tremendously helpful Israel websites that I always come back to and wanted to share.
Post Office: Displays all the post office locations in Jerusalem and their crazy hours because who can remember when they take their 4 hour lunch breaks. For other cities in Israel, you can click on the top link on the right sidebar to change the city. The “english” section doesn’t have much more that fluffy filler text, so pretty much Hebrew only.
Directions and Maps: The closest thing to mapquest, emap.co.il (Internet Explorer only) is an amazing resource for finding how to get around in Jerusalem and the rest of Israel. Available in Hebrew and English.
Movies: Seret.co.il lets you search by movie title, theater, or genre. When you select a theater, for example, the Globus theater in the Malha mall or Rav Chen in Talpiot, it brings up the phone number, address, and a current listing of all the movie showtimes. In Hebrew only.
Concerts, Theater: Hadran lets you buy tickets for the hottest performances happening all over Israel. I’ve never used it, but it looks reliable and professional. Available in Hebrew and English.
Israel Railways Train Schedule: Though the price of tickets is hard to find, the site is good for looking up the train times. The last time I took the train I believe it was 17.10 shekels for students – one way. Much quieter, hassle-free, and more leg room than the Egged busses. Only drawback is it takes a little longer to get where you’re going and I think the direct train from Jlem to TA is not running anymore? In English and Hebrew.
Bus Routes: Although the Egged site might be good to look at for travel info to the Dead Sea, Tel Aviv, or Haifa, it doesn’t have a very user-friendly or up-to-date map of which bus to take within Jerusalem and other cities. So, use Egged in English or Hebrew for travel between cities and Wikipedia in English for a look at which bus to take within Jerusalem.
Let’s liven things up around here:
Police Poo Poo
I bike in Jerusalem. I take to the streets and pedal my tushy up the hills of gold. I sweat as I cut off crazy Israeli drivers and curse them under my breath. I don’t know how I do it but somehow I have never been in an accident and the helmet remains more of a fashion statement than safety tool. And while I haven’t found my body under the tires of a nut job Israeli who is smoking, talking on their cell, yelling at their kids, changing the baby’s diaper (nooo!) or just not paying attention to the road, I can’t help but wonder- how the hell do I stay on the bike?
There is no one answer for this question but there is a group of people that I know DO NOT help me in staying alive and that would be the police. I will say a big no thank you to the police force that drive around their city with flashing lights, yelling in their loudspeakers and cutting off the crazy Israeli drivers- you (police force as a whole) are crap. Not only does the so-called force break the rules themselves but they do not enforce the law even when they see it being broken to a dangerous extent. Continue reading this entry »
Warning: Prepare for false gumball hopes this Sukkot
It would seem cruel to put gumballs in arms reach of a little child and then forbid him from eating them. But, in a stroke of genius, the Jerusalem municipality that we have all come to love (and hate), has done exactly that. The municipality decided to set up a sukkah in Kikar Safra and fill it with candy and gumball machines that are purposely out of order. You can look, but you can’t touch.
How could that ever have been perceived as a good idea? Maybe it went something like this: I know, let’s have kids walk in with great hopes of delicious candy and play a cruel, sick joke on them by not allowing them to have any. Oh, and we’ll have a clever play on words so everyone will chuckle – sukkariyah (candy) in the sukkah! weeee.
But don’t worry, when the kids saw what the city had in store for them, they fought back, in the best way that kids know how. They shook those machines and stuffed money in, until damnit, they worked and candy came out. So ha-ha to you, Mr. Every-2-Seconds-Announcement-that-the-machines-don’t-work and the city of Jerusalem. Take that.
Maybe they had been reading some old Mitch Hedberg jokes….
“I like cinnamon rolls, but I don’t always have time to make a pan. That’s why I wish they would sell cinnamon roll incense. After all, I’d rather light a stick and have my roommate wake up with false hopes.” -Mitch Hedberg
Jerusalem got much funnier last night
These two guys above, Avi Liberman and Benji Lovitt put on an awesome comedy show last night at the Begin Center. As in Menachim Begin, not ‘start here’ I haven’t had such a good laugh in a long time. Although you can never recapture the jokes you hear at a comedy show, I am taking after my dad, and jotted down the main ideas so I could make myself laugh again the next day. And it worked! If you get the chance to see either of them at another show, I highly recommend it for a good time. Avi is from LA and Benji lives in TA, so I’m not sure what the chances are of them starring together again, but hey, you never know. (Update: Avi might be back in December)
Thanks Honest Reporting for putting the event together – they probably needed to laugh more than anyone else in the audience.
Awesome Sukkot Video
Here’s another one of Molly’s awesome and funny videos, “Sukkot Shake”. Happy Sukkot and enjoy the video!
The light rail delayed, new form of transportation takes off
Here’s a shocker – the light rail has been delayed yet again and will be completed by the year two thousand and never. So, while we sit around and wait for an update, there’s a new mode of transportation gaining popularity – the sneaker. Here’s a preview of this new technologically advanced system that I filmed last night, first-hand, from Ben Yehuda St.
Shmita Unplugged- laws, loopholes, and support groups
As Jerry Seinfeld might put it, what’s the deal with shmita? This is my first time in Israel for a Shmita year and I’ve tried to understand all the laws and practices about 15 times and I still have a blank look on my face. Luckily, I found a handy dandy Shmita FAQ by Rabbi Weiss in Ranaana, a Yahoo support group, and a website for all my Shmita cuirosities. Here’s a shocking bit about shmita in Israel, the supermarkets don’t feel any differnet – no signs, no labels, no special shmita rabbi, just the same old same old. And one more comment before the real deal about shmita, whats with the spelling – I’ve seen the following versions: shmita, shmitta, shmittah, shemittah, shmmmmmmitah. It’s out of control.
Here’s a simplified slice from Rabbi Weiss’ Q&A. Continue reading this entry »
Ahmandinejad “the dude”
Does this Ahmandinejad know how to sell himself or what? When the President of Iran comes to town, New York New York, he makes sure everyone from CNN to the average U.S. citizen who can’t even place Iran on a map, is at least aware that the “dude” is on his way. Continue reading this entry »
Dancing in the Streets
While it isn’t exactly dancing in the street, Israelis can be found walking, biking or just sitting in the middle of the road on Yom Kippur.
Who is a fan of Yom Kippur? I mean lets face it, fasting and praying isn’t what I call fun, yet since moving to Israel I actually look forward to this otherwise dull holiday. Most people will tell you that you should experience Israel during the high holidays where you are bound to have a moving religious experience. After all it is amazing to finally not just say, “Next year in Jerusalem,” but actually be in Jerusalem chanting the prayer. Continue reading this entry »
The Big Felafel 
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Janglo goes comments, where’s the heads up?
As we know, Janglo, the can’t-function-without-it Jerusalem Anglo community website has undergone many changes – starting out as a Yahoo group and transitioning to a more user-friendly site at janglo.net with RSS feeds, an event calendar, and now the most revolutionary feature- comments. Previously, when someone would post something common, like today’s FREESWAP: ROOSTER, people would respond only to that person who posted and no one else could benefit from the responses.
But today, everything changed in Janglo-land. For better or for worse. Continue reading this entry »